Transcript

In the days before expectant fathers were allowed in the delivery room, four dads-to-be gathered in a Minneapolis hospital waiting room while their wives were in labor.

The nurse arrived and announced to the first man, “Congratulations, sir. You’re the father of twins.” The man was very proud and said, “What a coincidence. I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team.”

The nurse returned in a little while and spoke to the second man, “Dad, you’re the father of triplets.” The faltering father replied, “Wow, that’s an incredible coincidence. I work for 3M.”

An hour later, the nurse came back with some news for the third man, “Way to go! Your wife just gave birth to quadruplets.” The man was stunned and had to sit down. When he gathered himself he said, “I don’t believe it. What an incredible coincidence! I work at the Four Seasons Hotel.”

Just then the fourth guy fainted and crashed to the floor. The nurse rushed over to him and gave him some smelling salts. When he was finally able to speak, he muttered: “I never should’ve have taken that job at 7-Eleven.”

The next saying of our Lord from the Cross is about family and commitment to care for one another.

The Cross is about Christ, in His selfless love, putting us and our greatest need first. He died for all, for sinners, as He took our place and paid for our sins, so that we might be saved from the judgment of the second death and have the gift of eternal life.

At the Cross, even in His pain and suffering, we find Christ thinking of others. We see it when He looked over to the thief on the Cross who believed on Him and comforted him by telling him, “To day you will be with Me in paradise.”

And we see it demonstrated in how He took care of His mother from the Cross.

John 19:25: “Now there stood by the cross of Jesus his mother, and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Cleophas, and Mary Magdalene.”

In verses 23 and 24, we read about Christ’s execution squad and how they divided His garments among themselves. Then because of the value of Christ’s seamless coat or tunic, they decide not to tear it, but instead to cast lots and gamble for it.

In doing this, they unknowingly fulfilled a prophecy from Psalm 22:18: “They part my garments among them, and cast lots upon my vesture.” The image here is of cold, callous Roman soldiers gambling at the foot of the Cross for the Lord’s garment.

But then in stark contrast to these uncaring soldiers, in verse 25, we see people who truly cared about the Lord by the Cross.

There were five people: The Lord’s mother, His aunt, Mary wife of Cleophas, Mary Magdalene, and we learn in verse 26 that the disciple John was also there.

It took courage for each of them to show up. They had to make their way to the Cross to stand near the Lord through the middle of any angry and ridiculing mob.

There’s a contrast between love and hate here in the crowd at the Cross. In the middle of the cruelty and hatred were those who truly loved the Lord.

And from the Cross, seeing kind and caring faces, seeing His mother, His aunt, and three of His followers there had to have encouraged the Lord as He was suffering.

“His mother,” Mary was there. Often in our effort to keep Mary from being venerated too highly, we Protestants have denied her the recognition she should have for her faithfulness and courage. Mary was a woman of faith.

When so many were scrambling in fear on this day, she was at the Cross. And when Christ saw His mother by the Cross, she was not a crumpled heap, she was STANDING, verse 25 says.

The first time Mary was mentioned in the Gospel of John, she was attending a wedding at Cana with Christ. Now she was preparing for a funeral at Calvary.

Mary is simply identified by John as “His mother,” without even mentioning her name, which is consistent in reminding us of the low profile that Mary had during the Lord’s earthly ministry.

Mary was chosen by God and given the special privilege of giving birth to the Messiah of Israel. She is never called the “mother of God” in Scripture.

But rather, like in Acts 1:14, she is called “the mother of Jesus.” Jesus is the name of our Lord in His humanity. Since, as man, He was born of Mary, it is proper that she should be called the mother of Jesus.

One author describes Mary well at this point, “Mary is older now. The hair at her temples is gray. Wrinkles have replaced her youthful skin. Her hands are calloused. She has raised a houseful of children. And now she beholds the crucifixion of her firstborn.”

Everything that was taking place on the Cross and around it had to have been difficult for Mary as a mother. She saw the Lord bloodied from His brutal scourging, crucified and suspended on a Cross, nails through His hands and feet, suffering and in agony.

She heard the cruel mocking and the hateful things people were saying to Him as He hung there. Because He was condemned to die, she saw the soldiers coldly divvying up his garments and gambling for the Lord’s seamless coat.

A. W. Pink says this about Mary: “Her life was lived in the background, among the shadows. But now, when the supreme hour strikes of her Son’s agony, when the world has cast out the Child of her womb, she stand there by the Cross…nearest to the cruel Tree!

“…bound by…love to the Dying One, there she stands…His disciples may desert Him, and His friends forsake Him, His nation may despise Him, but His mother stands there at the foot of His Cross.”

At this moment, Mary was experiencing the prophecy from Simeon that had been predicted shortly after Christ’s birth, when they met him in the temple.

Luke 2:34-35 reads: “And Simeon blessed them, and said unto Mary his mother, Behold, this child is set for the fall and rising again of many in Israel; and for a Sign which shall be spoken against; (Yea, a sword shall pierce through thy own soul also,) that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed.”

The term “sword” here refers, not to a small handheld sword, but to a large, long sword and Simeon predicted a sword like this would be thrust straight through her soul, referring to the personal grief Mary would endure as she watched her son die in agony.

Mary was experiencing the fulfillment of Simeon’s prophecy at this moment, that sword went through her soul right here.

This causes you to think of the love between our natural family and the pain and sorrow that the separation of death brings to it.

One author wrote this: “Question: What kind of God would give you families and then ask you to leave them…and say goodbye?

“Answer: A God who knows that we are only pilgrims and that eternity is so close that any ‘Goodbye’ is, in reality, a ‘See you tomorrow.’”

Also present at the foot of the Cross were three other women: Mary’s sister and the Lord’s aunt, Mary the wife of Cleophas was present, and Mary Magdalene.

Out of these three women, we know the most about Mary Magdalene. We know she was not the woman caught in adultery in John 8 or the sinful woman mentioned in Luke 7.

Mary was a Magdalene, a Galilean woman from a fishing village on the western shore of the Sea of Galilee called Magdala.

Christ had delivered Mary Magdalene from seven demons. Luke 8:2 reads: “And certain women, which had been healed of evil spirits and infirmities, Mary called Magdalene, out of whom went seven devils.”

Following her deliverance from these demons, Mary’s heart was filled with gratitude, and as a result, she faithfully followed the Lord. She is a great example to all of us. Because we, too, have been delivered by Christ, delivered from all our sins. And like Mary, out of a heart of gratitude, our response should be to faithfully follow and live for our Savior.

Mary was part of the contingent of Galilean women who had followed the Lord and come to Jerusalem with Him and His disciples for the Passover.

This account of the Lord speaking to His mother took place between 9:00am and noon, during the first three hours when the Lord was on the cross.

After this, Mary Magdalene left the area immediately around the cross, but she remained nearby, watching from a distance with many other women.

Following the earthquake after Christ died, we read in Matthew 27: “And many women were there beholding afar off, which followed Jesus from Galilee…Among which was Mary Magdalene…” (27:55-56).

Three of the women mentioned here in John 19 are named Mary, which means “bitterness.” And at this time, they were living up to the meaning of their names, as they were facing the bitterness of sorrow watching the Lord suffer.

Mary was a very popular name at that time. It is the Greek form of the Hebrew name “Miriam,” who was the sister of Moses. Thus, many Jewish mothers chose to use this name because of the important history of Israel during the days of Moses and Miriam.

John 19:26: “When Jesus therefore saw his mother, and the disciple standing by, whom he loved, he saith unto his mother, Woman, behold thy son!”

John referred to himself in his Gospel record as “the disciple…whom He loved.”

John loved the Lord, and he knew that the Lord loved him, and so he humbly referred to himself in this way, rather than by his name. And he probably took comfort in knowing this and calling himself this. We can be comforted too, knowing that Christ loves each of us unconditionally. And we each can call ourselves, “the one Christ loves.”

“For God so loved the world,” is perhaps the most familiar verse in his gospel and probably the Bible. Love is a recurring theme of the Gospel of John and the epistle of 1 John and it is woven throughout both of those books of the Bible.

John was a man who had been changed and transformed by the love of Christ. And John saw love here at the Cross in the exchange between the Lord and His mother, and John gave us his eyewitness account of it.

At the cross, the Lord saw His mother, and He saw her pain and sorrow. And the Lord saw John also near the cross. And “He saith unto His mother, Woman, behold thy son!”

The whole scene of the harsh brutality of crucifixion, the suffering of Christ, the hatred and mocking words of the crowd, and the callousness of the soldiers, it is all softened by Christ’s words of comfort and tenderness in His third saying from the cross.

It is difficult to think about someone else when you are hurting and in pain. But Christ, in His dying moments, experiencing the pain and torment of crucifixion, out of selfless love thought not of Himself, and He took care of His grieving mother.

In the midst of His suffering, He had her good, her welfare and her protection on His mind by putting her in a good home.

And that is exactly what Christ was doing for you and me as well in the pain and torment of the Cross in dying for our sins: He had our good, our welfare, our protection on His mind, to rescue us from the penalty of our sins and eternity in the Lake of Fire and to give us a good home, a safe home, the best home in heaven.

Christ addressed Mary, “Woman, behold thy son!” which means “Look at John, and consider him as your son.” Christ assured His mother of His love by giving the disciple “whom He loved” to be her adopted son to care for her.

The Lord was following His Word in Proverbs 23:22: “Hearken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise [or disregard] not thy mother when she is old.”

And as the Lord was made under the law, lived under the law and kept the law perfectly, the Lord was also living out His obligation as a son in accordance with the Law and the ten commandments to “Honour thy father and thy mother” (Ex. 20:12).

And in honoring His mother, as He kept the law perfectly, reminds us of the sinlessness and perfection of Christ. It reminds us that the Cross was about Christ, the sinless, spotless Lamb of God, taking our iniquities on Himself and dying for us and our sins.

The Lord called her “Woman.” Now to all husbands and sons, it’s a good idea to avoid this term of address in calling your wife or mother, “Woman.” It doesn’t go over very well in 21st-century English and culture. If I said to my wife: “Woman, what’s for supper?” I’d probably be going to get my own supper at McDonald’s and sleeping on the couch.

In the culture and language of first-century Israel, however, this term of address was polite and respectful. It was much like addressing a woman as “Ma’am.”

It was a common term in the first century that does not reflect irreverence or disrespect, but neither is it a term of endearment.

Christ addressed Mary like this at His first miracle at the wedding in Cana when He said: “Woman, what have I to do with thee? Mine hour is not yet come” (2:4).

Interestingly, Christ never called Mary “mother” in the Gospel records. But, of course, over and over again, He referred to and spoke to the “Father.”

By calling Mary, “woman,” the Lord was showing that He was a heavenly Son and she an earthly mother. Calling her “woman” wasn’t meant to be disrespectful, but it was meant to reinforce separation and to cause her and us to stop and note that He is the Son of God.

And that reminder that Christ is God drives home to us that at the Cross, the Savior was more than able to pay for all our sins and take them away and to make us right with God.

Though Christ didn’t call her, “mother,” we know He loved Mary, because of what He said to her in putting her into the care of John. And that was love.

He wanted her to be cared for following His departure from this world through His death, resurrection, and ascension, and He provided John to be that caregiver.

So first, Christ addressed Mary as “Woman” to reinforce separation and show that He is the Son of God. Second, He said “Woman” to protect Mary.

Using the word “mother” would have driven the sharp and painful sword of sorrow predicted by Simeon even deeper into her soul.

In addition, by calling her “mother” in front of that hateful crowd and the enemies of Christ around the Cross may have inflicted ridicule and scorn on her by all of them. Christ loved Mary and did not want to bring her more sorrow and grief by this.

And third, Christ also called her “Woman” to establish His role as Savior. Mary needed now relate to Christ not as her son, but as her Savior and Lord.

In Luke 1, when Mary magnified and praised the Lord for the privilege of giving birth to the Messiah, she exclaimed, “my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Savior” (1:47).

Mary was in need of a Savior. She wasn’t a co-redeemer, the Queen of Heaven, or any contributor to salvation whatsoever; she was a sinner in need of redemption. She needed a Savior, just like we do. Now here at the Cross, she was being shown and taught not to look at Christ as her son, but as her Savior.

Why didn’t the Lord put Mary into the care of Joseph? Joseph is never mentioned in Scripture again after Luke 2:41-51.

The last time we see Joseph in the Bible is when the Lord was 12 years old and He and Joseph and Mary were visiting the temple in Jerusalem. Traveling in a large company of family and friends, they accidentally left the Lord behind.

When the Lord’s earthly ministry began at the wedding in Cana and the Lord was 30 years old, Mary is mentioned as being there with Christ, but not Joseph.

So the hint is from the argument of silence, that Joseph was not alive when Christ’s ministry began or when He was crucified, and that he probably died between the time the Lord was 12 and 30 years old. Mary was a widow. As the first-born son, Christ was responsible to make sure she was cared for.

That begs a second question: Why didn’t the Lord put Mary into the care of His brothers?

The Lord had at least four half-brothers. Matthew records the names of Christ’s siblings.

Those who rejected the Lord said in Matthew 13:55,56: “Is not this the carpenter’s son? is not His mother called Mary? and His brethren, James, and Joses, and Simon, and Judas? And His sisters, are they not all with us?”

Four brothers are named: James, Joseph, Simon, and Judas, as well as His sisters. So Mary had children with Joseph that she could’ve been placed into the care of.

But John, in this book in 7:5, wrote, “For neither did His brethren [brothers] believe in Him.” The reason the Lord did not put Mary in the care of His brothers is because of their unbelief. His brothers did not believe in Him. His mother did.

Thus, the Lord put her in the care of one who would not only love her and care for her as his own mother, but also one who loved Christ and believed in Him as one of His closest followers. The Lord put her in the care of one who’d help and minister to her spiritually.

But in truth, Mary WAS entrusted to family, spiritual family, the family of God. Often spiritual family bonds are closer than natural family bonds.

We are made family at the Cross. We are made one at the Cross. The bonds within the family of God run deep and are strong.

Christ had a closer bond with John than with His own siblings, therefore you find Him entrusting His own mother into the care of One of His closest followers.

The strong spiritual ties within God’s family are powerful and real, even with people we may have not known that long. Roots deepen quickly in Christ.

You can feel like you’ve known each other forever when you first meet another believer. We are bound together by the blood of Christ. And it’s a special and unique bond that we have in Christ.

As Paul wrote in Ephesians 2:19, “Now therefore ye are no more strangers and foreigners, but fellowcitizens with the saints, and of the household of God.” All the members of the Body of Christ are of the same house, the same family, the family of God.

Mary needed to be cared for. She was a widow, and at that time, the rest of her children didn’t believe in Him.

For her good, Christ’s mother needed someone to care for her who believed in Him, someone who would represent Him to her and remind her of the truth and God’s Word, and that someone happened to be the disciple that was standing there at the Cross.

And so the Lord looked down at her and said, “Woman, behold, your son!” and He placed her in the care of the apostle John.

John 19:27: “Then saith he to the disciple, Behold thy mother! And from that hour that disciple took her unto his own home.”

Christ addressed Mary and said, “Woman, behold your son.” Then He addressed John, and said, “Behold your mother.”

Christ was asking John to be the son that a mother needs. In effect, Christ was saying, “John, look at Mary, I charge you to adopt this woman as your mother. Take her into your home, take her into your life. Love her and care for her.”

The Lord asked John that his home, his family, his world now include Mary. Care for her, be a son to her. It was clear and firm, yet it was full of tenderness and love.

He introduced John to her as the one who would hereafter take the place of son to her. Christ then instructed John to care for Mary as if she were his own mother.

This is remarkable in light of Mark 14:50 which tells us that in the Garden of Gethsemane when they arrested the Lord, “And they ALL forsook Him, and fled.” All the disciples ran in fear, including John. John bolted when things got tough.

But he didn’t stay away. John and Peter returned after initially running away and followed at a distance as the Lord was led to His trial at Caiphas’s house. Now after Christ had been crucified, we find that John made his way to the cross with these four women.

He returned to Christ and when He did and Christ saw him, he wasn’t scolded or shamed for forsaking Him and fleeing. There was no rebuke for John. Only confidence in Him was extended. He was given grace and recommissioned for ministry.

John found grace and forgiveness at the Cross. Grace was extended to one who failed. And that’s what we find at the Cross: grace and forgiveness. We’ve all failed, we’ve all sinned, but when we go to the Cross, we receive grace and forgiveness.

John’s actions also teach us that we can run from the Lord in life, but when we come back, by grace, He can and He will still use us.

The Lord, in His confidence in John, and honoring the disciple who was courageous enough to stand with Christ and be present at the crucifixion, committed the care of His mother to John. Christ gave His mother to one of His dearest friends, and this friend He gave to His broken-hearted and widowed mother.

And when the Lord did, John did not question Him by asking, “Lord, What about your brothers and sisters? Can’t they take care of your mother?”

Instead, John’s obedience was immediate, unquestioning, and sacrificial. And that is a good example for us to follow with Christ’s instruction in His Word to us.

And John wrote, “And from that hour that disciple took her unto his own home.”

Immediately and willingly, John took Mary into his home and life from that point forward. Both John and Mary obeyed this solemn instruction of Christ from the Cross.

The last time we see Mary in Scripture, she was in the upper room with John and the other apostles after Christ’s ascension. She was also with the Lord’s brothers, who had come to believe on Christ after His resurrection. And they were all together, in prayer, waiting for the coming of the Holy Spirit to Israel on the Day of Pentecost.

Acts 1:13,14 reads, “And when they were come in, they went up into an upper room, where abode both Peter, and James, and John…These all continued with one accord in prayer…with the women, and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with His brethren.”

For John, this responsibility given to Him by the Lord was a privilege. And the responsibilities the Lord has given to us in life and ministry should be viewed the same. They are an honor.