My best friend throughout college had a remarkably godly mother. She had a quiet inner strength that exuded a spiritual influence and stability that positively influenced her family. She was a “guide [to] the house” (I Timothy 5:14) as she gently encouraged family devotions, gave godly biblical counsel, and constantly prayed for her family. “She [also] opened her mouth with wisdom, and in her tongue is the law of kindness” (Proverbs 31:26). She was married to a man who was certainly saved, yet he had strangely stubborn, foolish, and often ungodly tendencies. Nonetheless, this woman remained a constant godly woman and submissive wife. Given that her circumstances were far from ideal, it must have often been difficult. But she submitted to her husband’s leadership in the home while softly encouraging him to be a man of God.

The Apostle Peter left timeless principles about the role of women in marriage. He wrote by inspiration: “…ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the Word, they also may without the Word be won by the conversation [or manner of life] of the wives” (I Peter 3:1). The word “subjection” means to subordinate or obey. A married couple should be a team, giving mutual respect and working in harmony. Yet it is God’s design for a wife to submit to her husband’s leadership in the home. This doesn’t mean she is weak. To the contrary, it takes great inner strength for a capable and intelligent woman to take a step back to allow her husband to be the head of the home. Doing so gives her man room to grow and encourages him to be all he can be. Her outer adornments are wonderful IF secondary to adorning herself with the inner qualities of “a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price” (vss. 3-4). The combination of submission to her husband with a quiet spirit, and cultivating genuine inner spiritual strength, makes any woman a real beauty. Moreover, such godliness can win even a stubborn lost mate to Christ as he sees virtues he needs (vs. 2).

Ladies who seek to follow this divine design for marriage are worthy of great respect and admiration. They will find this is the path for maximum marital harmony and godly influence to everyone in their home. If you are a married woman, ask for God’s so strength that your life can be described by these principles.